Page 4125 - Week 13 - Thursday, 6 December 2007

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opposition cars are a series of compromises, but more often than not these compromising cars are bland and soulless in reality. According to Aston Martin, sports cars should be all about character and driver involvement. They need to look great, sound great and have power and performance to match—but you may need a second approp to buy one.

Katy receives the Toyota Tarago people-mover. Stylish and versatile, the Toyota Tarago is also uncompromising in its performance and ability. There is nothing part time about this workhorse with its 3.5 litre, 202 kilowatt, six-speed engine. Can I also add that with the option of a V8 there is also the opportunity to move up to the top level.

Our emergency services minister Simon Corbell should be issued with the bushfire truck—”the foam pumper” as he is known by his mates—for his ability to quash opposition debate at the flick of a switch.

John Hargreaves is allocated the departmental Camry driven by Mr Zissler. Should the minister ever feel the need to act on his own impulse, Mr Zissler is there to pull on the handbrake.

Minister Barr is fittingly awarded with the Top Fuel Dragster with rainbow livery. Its $2 million price tag is nothing in comparison with the $6 million mountain bike rack mounted on the roof. But where will he drive this, one may ask.

Karin MacDonald, through her frugal ways, gets the Budget rent-a-car, a smart alternative to purchasing a vehicle, although those return deadlines really do play hell with her time management.

Mary Porter has the standard Holden sedan—no fancy bells and whistles but gutsy enough to power on day in and day out and relatively popular—but it is currently up on blocks until the rear axle reconditioning is completed.

The Leader of the Opposition this year receives the ASLAV award—the Australian light armoured vehicle, a marvellous, amphibious vehicle that even when it is out of its depth can still operate with its submarine machinegun taking pot shots across the chamber. But of course Bill is also aware of the dangers behind and has made some modifications to the armour between the shoulder blades of the ASLAV in preparation for the next nine months.

It is all about balance with Zed, so of course it is the BMW X3—a striking equilibrium of style and performance, happy to tell you about its European engineering, but we all know it is just another tacky, overpriced, middle-of-the-range poser’s car. He has potential to be the best but his own organisation cannot justify the extra finance to buy him a few more bells and whistles. There is currently a seat vacant next to the ASLAV if he feels like jumping over.

Jacqui, of course, gets the Ford ute. It is able to carry two passengers but also quite a bit of extraneous luggage.


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